Many people new to a mixed faith marriage have been told that it is HARD and CHALLENGING and probably won’t work. Its no surprise that is then exactly what is experienced.
What often happens is that we start to notice and focus on all the problems. We make the list and repeat that list often.
-Sundays are hard.
-The kids will be confused.
-This is terrible.
-This won’t work.
-I don’t know if I can do this.
-This is a problem.
and on and on.
We give all our attention to the problems. We ignore the rest.
I am suggesting that yes, there are issues that are real to your marriage. Yes, you may want to focus on them. You may also want to spend some time focusing on what is working and what is wonderful or helpful or nice about your marriage.
Give equal time to both. I am not saying ignore the “bad” stuff. I am saying don’t ignore the “good” stuff.
For all the time you give to the problems, make sure you give an equal amount of time to the stuff you are grateful for as well.
Here are some ideas to get you started:
-We both love our kids
-We are good partners when it comes to (making dinner, putting kids to bed, taking care of the lawn etc)
-We enjoy doing _________ together.
-We have overcome ____________ together.
-We have a nice home that we have created together.
-We are doing what we think is right.
Its ok to be real and see the problems. – life is not all rainbows and daisies, but it is also not all black tar and storm clouds. Both are lies. Tell yourself the truth and notice both the bad and the good in your marriage. This will help. When we spend all our time and energy focused on the problems we cannot find any solutions.
Love this idea and want more great tools and help for your mixed faith marriage? I can help. You can have a great marriage no matter what! It only takes one partner willing to do the work. Let’s talk and get you the help you need.
All you need to do is CLCIK HERE to schedule a free call and we will arrange a time to talk about your marriage and what you want to create in your marriage and see if coaching is the right tool to get you there.